Newcomer FAQs
The following are some questions newcomers to ACA frequently ask.
Do I 'qualify' as an Adult Child?
Anyone who identifies with any part of The Problem or The Laundry Lists is welcome at an ACA meeting. You might also find this page helpful in understanding if you’re an ‘adult child’.
How do I join ACA and what is the cost?
There is no formal joining process or fee. Each meeting is self-supporting so at the end of their meeting they often ask for ‘7th Tradition’ contributions, which pay for their room rental or Zoom subscription, etc.
Can I attend if I didn't have an alcoholic parent?
Yes – many ACAs didn’t. The ACA programme of recovery applies to all forms of family dysfunction.
Can I just turn up at a meeting?
Yes, you can.
If it’s an in-person meeting arrive a few minutes before the start time and introduce yourself and someone will welcome you, and then lead the session. Some meetings have an email so you can contact them in advance if you wish to, but it’s not necessary unless the meeting description specifically asks you to do this.
For an online meeting, login at the start time of the Zoom call, and the secretary there will guide the session. Sometimes you need to email a contact person to acquire the Zoom logins and their email will be listed. Please find a quiet, private place to attend if you’re on Zoom, change your screen name to your first name only, and keep yourself on mute unless you’re speaking.
What happens at an ACA meeting?
Whilst each meeting is autonomous and run by its members, they all have common elements:
The Chair or Secretary will lead the session and read their meeting script. Near the start they often ask if any newcomers are present, so they can welcome you.
The group will read The Problem or Laundry List, and The Solution.
The script will remind attendees about not ‘cross-talking’ (responding or referring to someone’s share) and confidentiality.
Meetings usually have a main reading which is unique to that week. A meeting’s main reading, or focus, is often stated in the meeting description on their meeting page of this website. The main reading is usually taken from ACA literature.
There will always be ‘share time’ at an ACA meeting, which is when those present can speak without fear of judgement or feedback. No-one has to ‘share’ if they don’t want to.
Because each meeting is self-supporting, near the end they usually ask for ‘7th Tradition’ contributions, which is how they pay for room rental, leaflets or Zoom subscriptions.
There are lots of different types of meetings listed on the website - which ones are suitable for newcomers?
Meetings read a range of different ACA literature, which focus on different aspect of recovery. As a newcomer it’s great to find one reading A New Hope because it’s a beginners’ handbook. Strengthening My Recovery can be good for people starting out because it’s bite-sized extracts of ACA material. What is known as the ‘Big Red Book’ is our main text.
What’s equally important is finding a meeting you feel safe and welcome at, with people you resonate with.
When you’re new we recommend that you try six meetings before deciding if ACA is a fit for you, so it’s an ideal time to attend different meetings and hear main readings from a range of ACA literature.
Is there any free literature?
You can download all free ACA leaflets and guides on the ACA World Service Organisation website here.
For newcomers to the fellowship we recommend:
Do I have to go to the same meeting every week?
Having a regular attendance at ACA meetings is important to support your recovery but no, it doesn’t have to be the same meeting.
That said, one of the advantages of having a ‘home group’ is being able to grow trusted ACA friendships, which are important for recovery not only for outreach but because when you want to work The Steps or another workbook this must be done with fellow traveller(s) or a sponsor.
Can I only attend one meeting a week?
You can go to as many meetings as you want to. In times of distress many ACAs find support in attending a meeting every day.
Can anyone start an ACA meeting?
Please see this list of FAQs for ACAs in service in meetings.
I can't find an in-person meeting near me
Do look at this map to double-check our current meeting locations, but yes, there are areas that don’t have an in-person meeting close by, at this time.
We encourage you to try online meetings. If you click the meeting name it’ll take you to their page, which has more info. Below that it’ll usually have the Zoom login details and sometimes a direct link (the Join with Zoom button). Sometimes you need to email a contact person to acquire the Zoom logins and their email will be listed.
You login at the start time of the Zoom call, and the secretary there will guide the session. Please find a quiet, private place to attend if you’re on Zoom, change your screen name to your first name only, and keep yourself on mute unless you’re speaking.
If you have a question that isn’t answered here please contact us on info@adultchildrenofalcoholics.co.uk.